The Mummys Club

aaron
i was due the 27th feb 06 and at about 10pm i woke up from a nap with contractions, they started coming really fast so phoned the hospital and they told me to stay home as long as i could, anyway about an hour later went in and they examined me and was only 1cm dialated! they were gonna send me home but then decided not to anyway within half an hour of this i felt like i need to push and mw checked me and was shocked that i was 10cm and ready to go!! about half an hour of pushing and aaron was born at 3.24 am weighing 7lb7 after 4 and a half hours of labour with gas and air 
corey
was 3 days over due and had had a sweep on due date, was just off to bed and sat down on the bed and felt waters go( hubby was at work on nights and i was at my mums) anyway told my mam and she was getting stuff ready in car and phoning hubby anyway stil no contractions but rang hospital and they sed to go stright in so mam drove me 40 mins to the hospital where hubby was waiting, went in seen mw and she sed waters deffo gone but cud go home as no contractions.. soo drove 40 mins back to mams and we all had a cuppa and felt like we were just waiting, decided to go to bed cos cud be nothing all night and it was gone 2.00am not long after we got into bed hubby sed r u okay ur breathing heavy and i was like errrr i think this might be the start, so we all got back out of bed sat downstairs a bit and my dad sed ur contractions are every 3 mins u know u better get going so we got back in the car (my mam n hubby in front and me laid on back seat) and pains were getting unbarable i started feeling a bit like i needed to push! i could see the panic in my mam n grays faces lol got back into the hospital and on the gas and air and was 7 cm anway about another 30 mins of contractions 2 pushes and corey was born at 4.34am weighing 8lb8 after about 2 hours of labour from 1st contraction
christian
was one day over due and had been walking loadsssss to try and get baby out and the day seemed to go and got into bed and as was laid in bed i sed to hubby ooo i feel a bit crampy and he shot out of bed and got ready given my track record! lol anyway few mins later i was like yeh this is deffo it! so we came downstairs and phoned my frieds who were coming to watch the boys and they only live round corner and by the time they got here my contraction were every 2 mins! my mate gave me and hubby a lift to hospital because about 10 mins later they were every 55 seconds  and by the time i got there ( a 5 min drive) i was about 6 cm!got my gas and air and it all just happened really quick again next thing needed to push and about 3/4 pushes and he was born at 2.06am weighing 7lb13 after 1hr and a half labour !but the cord was wrapped round his neck then between his legs then round his neck agian poor lil man so was quite blue but didnt take long for him to go back to a nice peachy colour  ive been really luck with my births never had stiches or any complications and always been really well after and went home within 10 hours of having all 3 of them and as u can see had them all really quick! 

Sophie’s Birth Story

After a horific preganancy plagued with severe morning sickness for the term needing 2 hospitalisations, a severe stomach infection needing a further hospitalisation, bleeding up until 20ish weeks, growth issues and urine infections about once a fortnight they were planning to induce me on Monday 22nd Feb. I started having contractions on the Sat (20th Feb) afternoon at about 2:15pm just as i was sitting down for my supposedly relaxing pedicure. I couldn’t time them as there was no clock but i got Mike to time them when we got home about 45 mins later at which point they were coming around every 2 mins and lasting 50-60 seconds but weren’t that painful. After three of these and while i was mid sentence trying to convince Mike i was fine and there was no need to run around like a headless chicken throwing random things into my hospital bad my waters went, immediatly followed by an urgent need to poo (sorry if tmi) Mike continued to panic while i rang delivery to tell them i was coming in. I did debate about using the loo as i wasn’t in to much pain but decided against it incase i ended up delivering down the loo. I changed my soaking wet pants while Lauren pointed at them going “mummy, ow ow (her word for having a wee)” she then shook her head at me and said “nappy mummy” in a really dissapinted tone.

Dropped Lauren off at my mums, Mike still panicing and it’s giving me the giggles watching him and then we drive at a rate of knotts to the hospital while i try to convince him to slow down and that i would like to get there in one piece. Up in delivery i get changed and go on the moniter for half an hour, everything is fine so i ask the midwife if i can go and have my poo (sorry if tmi again) as between contractions it’s giving me quite bad stomachache. She says thats fine, so off i trot. When i stand up to wipe i felt something between my legs and when i look down i saw about 4 inches of umbilical cord hanging out of me, i shout mike who pokes his head round the door and can clearly see it without me pointing it out. He gets the midwife who rushes me back to bed and everything kicks off.

Firstly they tried to deliver there and then, but they couldn’t get her out, and they completely lost the heartbeat. There was lots of shouting for the consultant to get to therete now and they ran me down the corridor to the operating room with a Midwife sat on the foot of the bed with her hand up me holding her head off the cord. I was given oxygen for 3 mins while they quickly prepared everything, luckily in this time i felt Sophie kick so knew she was still alive wich made me stress marginally less. The last thing i remember before going under is the consultant stood over me all scrubbed up holding the scalpel waiting for me to go under so he can begin to cut. I was attempiting to bargin with the anaethatist through the oxygen mask to make sure i was out before the surgen came anywhere near me with the scalpel. I was given a general anathestic and under 12 mins later at 5:48pm Sophie Eloise Kewley was born weighing 5lb 8oz. They tested blood from her cord to make sure that she wouldn’t suffer and lasting damage/effects and they say it was fine. Considering what is going on with her at the minute i’m not convinced but i am sure the staff did everything they possibly could and i can’t fault their actions at all.

They informed Mike who had had to stay in the delivery room that we were both fine as soon as they had tested her cord blood and as soon as she was ok to go they took her to Mike as stipulated in my Birth plan, rather than keeping her with me as is the usual thing. I wanted he to be held and i obviously was unable to do it. Really impressed that they did that as i know in emergency situations Birth plans are normally left by the wayside.

They took me back to the delivery room where i was still very out of it. Mike kept holding her up fo me to see and i kept telling him i couldn’t see her. He thought i had gone blind or something and had them check my eyes, which were fine. My vision just seemed to ‘cross’ at the end of my nose, so i could see there was a baby there but not what she looked like. It was just too complicated to explain while still feeling the effects of the general and doped up on morphine. They moved me down to the ward after about and hour and lay her in my arms on the bed for me to hold her on the way ( i don’t remember much about it) I was pretty out of it until the next morning, so i couldn’t breastfeed but they were very good and everytime she needed feeding they brought her over to the bed for me to see her while they gave her a bottle.

I didn’t actually realise how serious everything was until the next day when the dr’s came round and told me how lucky she was just to be alive.

Still regret not seeing her being born and not getting the skin to skin straight away, as i missed out on it with Lauren too. But it’s a small price to pay for her being alive.

Here i am just back from Theater

Mike left the Isle of Man (where we were living at the time) for an interview on the mainland and i was supposed to be going to the local zoo with a huge group of mum’s from the local family centre. While there i began with a pain in my back under my ribs. Ended up being rushed into hospital with a suspected blood clot in the lung. I was put on the maternity ward (in a nice private room) while they did a million and one tests. After several days lots of tests, many IV lines, much vomiting and copious amounts of pethadine for the pain they diagnosed me with gall stones and cholecystitis (infection of the gall bladder). They made the decision to induce me when i got to 37 weeks as i was in so much pain. The morning of my 37th week i went into labour of my own accord. The midwifes kept assuring me that i wasn’t in labour and the baby was just pushing down even though i was having pains every 5 mins. Come 2pm when my lovely midwife came in and saw me leaning over the bed rocking from side to side she decided to examine me. Found i was 2cm and she gave me a sweep (ouch), she then went to arrange to get me transfered to a delivery room as they wanted to give me an epidural as i was still in a lot of pain from my gall bladder. I called Mike and he gets a work mate to answer his mobile as he was on the phone. Was quite rude to her as she wouldn’t let me talk to him and then said ‘oh just get him to call me back’ and hung up on her. Mike finally calls back and i tell him i’m in labour and he needs to get to the hospital as i can’t do it by myself. To which his responce was ‘i’ll see what i can do.’ at which point i tell him in no uncertain terms that he will be putting everything down and comming to the hospital now! By the time he gets there i’m already in the delivery room and waiting for the anaethatist to do the epidural. He eventually turns up and tries 3 times to give me the epidural but to no avail. My waters went while Mike left the room to make a phone call and it was very thick meconium. They wouldn’t initially give me the gas and air as i was still vomiting from the gall bladder problem but after 2 hours and me managing to keep sips of drink down they gave it to me. Went on with my breathing and sucking on the gas and air. Started to push with contractions and the urge got stronger as time went on. At 7-40pm i asked my nice midwife how much longer she thought it would be and she said it depended on me and that i could be there 10 mins or 2 hours. I looked at the clock and announced to the room ‘i’m not being her for another 2 fu*king hours’. Then the 2nd midwife and 2 paediatricians came in and introduced themselves, trying to be polite i waved to them while gripping onto the gas and air (think they thought i was a bit mad) i was terrified of the pushing out stage so i asked for more pethadine, but she was born 10 mins later at 7-50pm before the pethadine had even kicked in, weighing 6lb’s exactly. I didn’t get to see her as she was rushed straight over to the dr’s, but she was crying so i knew she was ok. As she was born the midwife announced she was a girl and Mike turns and says in a very loud voice WHAT? – we were both expecting her to be a boy. By this time the pethadine had kicked in and everyone was busy with the baby and i remember desperatly trying not to fall off the bed. I was lying in the middle of the bed so it wasn’t going to happen but i was convinced i was going to fall off and no-one whould notice. Few minutes later they handed her to me all wrapped up.

I went back to the ward and an hour and a half later my mum and brother came to visit. My mum couldn’t belive that i had just given Birth as apparently i looked too ‘good’.

Overall it was a great experience aside from the gall bladder problems and i would do labour 10 times over than have another flare up of that. I didn’t tear or need an episotomy so so stiches which was great.

Here we are the next morning.

on the 2nd 3 rd jan i had really bad pain and cudnt stand or walk and weed constantlty .
so i woke ash up as i cudnt take any more and had no sleep cos of pain so he woke ashes mum up at 6am who rang the maternity they said to come in .

woke ash dad up and we all went to hosptial they gave me scan said id lost all the water and oput moniter on me they were getting really cross cos i had to keep going to toilet said they weregoing to keep me and give induction on thursday morning .

at 630 am thursday they woke me to start induction and it was really uncomfortable i cudnt sit lay stand i was in so much pain and scared they kept coming to see me then the gave me pessary at 630 pm at 1 am was still awake in pain n the nurse gave me some paracetmol and sleeping tablet still didnt sleep got told off cos i kept gettin out of bed .

friday 6 am hey gave me another pessary the pain was unbearbale i ended up walking round the ward god nos how many time at bout 13 30 they bropught llunch and but cudnt eat they said they see if i was dilated enough and said i was but to finsh my lunch and they let ash no so i ate slow as i cud looking out windwo till ash came as i was terrfied being oin own ash came with his mumas it wat i wanted then hey arrived as iwas going to deilvery ward .

when i got there mt waters brok which i was confused as they said all my waters had gone wen i had scan

they gave me gas air soon as they went and put machine on me to stronger cantractions they were really painfull the st hr gone hwas on second big bottle of gas n air the i crying cos i wanted to go him i got cramp in claf of my leg that was worse than contractions and they kept pulling on it then hte oput thing on bradley head 4 his heart bet and cut his head then they kept hittign his head saying they could feel the head it was horrible ebven now i can still feel it.

gave me p[ethdene at 8pm and promised no one wud leave while ashes mumwent bk to ash but they did i was terrified i dint no what i was doing not sure whats going on after that ias i donr t rember to much i rember them saying if he wernt out by midnight i cud have ceasearn 1030 rember coming to they were telling me i was nrly there at which point i go that cramp and they were getting annoyed cos i cudnt contrate on contractions when i was in pain the cramp which agin was worse then they gave me more pethdaden dont rember much till about 130 wehn they were tellingmeto push but cosmi was to tired not slept in 4 nights i found really hard they were getting really cross with me i had bradley 259 am on 6th in my notes it said i was really hysterical and bad in places they llef tme 2n hal hrs b4 they sewd me up they gave epidual to sew me upas i has 3rd degree tear think it that the worse one they said when i woke up from epidural i they didnt tell me i wudnt be able to feel my legs i frightned i was paralised. when bradley came out he wasnt breathing so gave him oxygen sort of cleaned gave him to me left room which my timee i was sick all over the place didnt no no what to do as i was on my own with bradley as nurses had left me n ash went to ring every1 10 minutes b4

bradey 6 hrs weight 9lb13 n half ounces

On Thursday 3rd June 2010 7 days over and very very fed up, we went to see the midwife Debbie. She gave me a sweep and then booked me in for an induction on the Sunday. Whilst doing my sweep she said I was about 3cms dilated and was surprised that I wasnt in any pain, said that if I’d gone into the labour ward to be checked she’d think I was in labour. The induction was booked but she said she doubted very much that I’d make it to the Sunday which was a relief cause I really didnt want to be induced.
We went home and I tried to rest as much as I could but I was having mild period pains and started to feel a bit ill. Sick and hot etc. I was ok after a while. At about 10pm I was aching again and said to Dave ” I think I’m just gonna go to bed cause I’ll be more comfortable lying down.” So I went up and watched Road Wars in bed for a bit, I remember my little sister texting me to see if I was ok and I text her back saying I have back ache and tummy ache. Eventually I got fed up and texted Dave to come upstairs and get in bed with me cause I was feeling quite achy and miserable by then, he came up and we had cuddles and went to sleep. At about 1:30 I woke up and thought omg toilet.. I really needed a poo  Went to the loo and spent about 20 mins on there emptying my bowels (sorry if tmi) not once did it occur to me that I might actually be in labour !! I got back in bed and said to Dave I’m really starting to ache now.. they weren’t contractions, it didnt feel anything like when I was having Poppy. My bum was aching and all my right side was aching. Soon I said to Dave I think I’m just gonna give the labour ward a ring just incase its anything starting.. so he said ok but said he still thought we should have waited a bit longer to see if anything happened. Rang labour ward and said I was feeling quite uncomfortable and that I’d like to just be checked over. My waters hadnt gone and still had no contractions. We were told to go in so while I sat on the loo once again having a poo, Dave got my stuff together and got ready to go. By now it was probably about 2am. I got off the loo and walked to the bedroom and was struck by a nasty pain and had to hang on to the end of the bed and crouch down. Still wasnt like a contraction though  We got into the car and headed off to the hospital which is about 5 mins away from our house, my pains started coming quite regularly… it wasnt even in my tummy it was all in my bum but by now I knew the baby was ready to come out. On arrival at the hospital Dave came to get me out of the car and I said to him “I’m gonna be pushin soon, ” and he said “FGS Lea dont give birth on the car park will ya!”
We got to the maternity entrance to find the door locked and I was like omfg I cant stand up anymore wtf is going on, they eventually let us in and I made straight for a wheel chair. They whisked me off up to assessment and took me into a waiting room where there were too policemen sat drinkin a cuppa, Dave muttered something to me about Road Wars to try and make me laugh but I said no I can’t listen I’m having a baby and apologised to the policemen for ignoring them  I then decided I wanted another wee and told the midwife that I wanted to go in the wheel chair.. while sitting on the loo my body began to push.

Omfg. I never felt a force like it. Sitting on a loo with a bed pan underneath me I (apparently) let out a scream and began to push. I also frightened the young midwife who ran across the room to me and said ” OMG NO DONT PUSH!” Like I could stop myself  Next thing I knew I was thrown into a wheel chair and Dave was called to say we had to go to delivery now there was no time to mess about. On the way to delivery I was moaning and squealing out,delivery was just across the corridor from where I was and just as we made it through the door to Room 8 on the delivery suite I was pushing again.
The midwives were running around me fiffing and faffing trying to get me onto a bed.. Dave was holding me up but there was no chance of getting me to that bed. Standing up in a wheel chair with about 10 midwives and Dave Allen holding me up (my feet were off the floor) my waters broke and Olivia was born  at 9lbs 1oz. I’d screamed the labour ward down, if they didnt hear me screaming in Birmingham they’re all deaf. But it wasnt pain it was the force of this little girl fighting her way out of me. No time for pain relief either. Thank god we left the house when we did.

Oh and for the record she was born at 3.24 am not 2.24 

I woke up at 6.55am thinking I was weeing the bed. I looked at Dave as he woke up at the exact same time and we both just knew it was my waters. So I looked down and sure enough there was water trickling onto the bed. We got up and called delivery straight away and were told to go straight in. I started getting dressed and more gushes of waters came then went back to trickles and went back to gushes. Eventually called a taxi and went off to New Cross. When I got there I was taken up to the maternity ward to be checked over. All the time I was texting Ariana and Tammy with updates while waiting for about an hour for them to come and see me. The midwife came and checked me over, and gave me a sweep without even telling me Shocked And told me i was 4cm dilated and that I could go straight up to delivery Shocked Shocked I didn’t expect to be in that quick at all. Walked up to delivery and went into the delivery room and started thinking s**t I’m actually going to have a baby hahah. I was really expecting to break down into huge panic attacks as soon as I went into labour but I was stupidly calm Confused I changed into my nightie and told the midwife I felt like I needed a poo, she said “oh no you can’t, its not poo its just the baby coming down.” And I just said “honest i really need to poo.” so i went into the loo and proved her wrong.. Dave said she was frightened of me pushing the baby out into the toilet lmao… Contractions started to get to every three minutes and weren’t really that painful, I was expecting to be doubled over in agony and screaming for epidurals.. I sat on a birthing ball with Dave on a chair behind me with a heat cushion on my back just holding onto Dave’s hands when a contraction came. Then all of a sudden I started to feel like I needed to push, not a real overwhelming urge straight away. So I was told to get on the bed so I could be checked and found I was 7cm’s (and still no pain relief) Contractions started to get worse and I asked for the gas and air.. I’d been putting it off for a while cause I was scared it’d make me feel weird. It did absolutely nothing for me while in labour. The urge to push got worse and the m/w was worried I wasn’t ready and I said I really can’t hold off any more ” I have got to push NOW!!” and I started to push.. After about an hour (apparently) they could see the head and Dave kept saying “it’s got hair its got hair” They asked me if I wanted to touch the head but I said no cause it’d have really freaked me out. Then I got that nasty burning feeling and before I knew it there was a wiggly wet baby on my belly staring at me Very Happy I was so happy and then Dave shouted ” It’s a girl !!” The whole thing was so emotional, I was so proud and she’s just so beautiful, I’d do it all over again it’s really not as bad as people make out.The worst thing for me was the recovery, I came out with a few stitches inside where I’d grazed and lost 800ml of blood and was really anemic but I can honestly say it was the best experience of my life

most of this is taken from notes jim made the week after and also backed up with medical information from my notes which i gained access to in jan 2009, so the tense may be wrong, syntax off etc.

This story is why James and I decided not to have any more babies. We would have loved another, but such is life.

I might add, what happened to me is called AFE and is incredibly rare. so rare that one of my consultants had never seen one and therefore (thinking he was god) decided to try and overrule the one who had seen one…

This is what may darling James wrote for me about what happened. I have no memories apart from a few wierd flashbacks which are incredibly scary. I’m actually really glad I don’t remember anything until thursday 9th feb 2006… I think.

Friday 3rd feb 2006: commented on weird period pain.
Sat 4th
2:30am feels like contractions.
4:30 am: James checked cervix, dialated. (yet, he stuck fingers up there to give it a feel)
6:00 am: James says for gods sake Emma, I’m taking you to hospital whether you like it or not.
6:15 am: got to hospital.
6:25 am: midwife checks cervix, it is dilated 4cms. Says “you’re small so you’re high risk”. I already knew this. it’s in my notes.
6:35 am: get to labour suite. Given gas and air mask. I like! Told to bear it as best I can. My progress will be checked in 4 hours.
10:15am: midwife rechecks cervix. Now 6cms.
8:30 am: asked for epidural. Anethsthetist came in to see me. said “have to see another lady first. Should get to you in 15-25 mins.”
9:00 am: no anaesthetist. Called away to theatre, should be anther 30 mins.
9:30 am: anaesthetist still in theatre. “I’ll take the pethadine”.
9:59 am: midwife administers the pethadine, needle in left thigh.
10:10 am: pethadine kicks in. “mmmm, it’s like gas and air, only mooooore” I know it bloody hurts, but i really don’t care.
10:50 am: anaesthetist finally turns up. “I don’t need it, I’ve had pethadine”.
2:20 pm: another inspection of cervix. Fully dilated but Sophie’s head is not moving down. she’s stuck, but may work her way out.
2:30 pm: waters broken manually.
11:30 pm: pethadine wears off. Demand epidural.
11:45 pm: anaesthetist takes 35 mins to administer epidural.
12:50 pm: epidural not working. Spine is difficult to judge. Line probably in wrong place. Will need to do it again. “No! Hurts too much, want to go home” epidural not redone.
1:15 pm: MW consults head nurse type person. She agrees to give more pethadine one our earlier than normal.
1:30pm: more pethadine (this is why i had a flexible birth plan!)
1:50 pethadine kicks in, but not enough.
2:55 pm: now waters have broken Sophie’s head in unbearable. Reluctantly agree to epidural refit.
3:15 pm: new epidural ready to go. having some breathing problems but told it’s nothing to do with the epidural, just the chest infection i’ve had.
3:30 Pm: this one works. Can feel pressure but not pain. Midwife Paula is coaching me through contractions.
5:00 pm: Sophie has not budged. I’m exhausted and scared, i ask for C section.
5:15 pm: taken to theatre.
5:15 pm: James told to get into scrubs. I’m taken in to be prepped.
5:25 pm: James is with me. The surgeon wants to try a forceps delivery. They lay me flat on my back… bear in mind i not only have spinal problems, I’m pregnant and I have a chest infection… my head is flat and my legs are in the air.
I struggle to breathe and have what they think is a severe panic attack, but what is actually the beginnings of the effects of the AFE. around 26% of AFE mothers die at this point. anyways, what was going on was obviously making breathing harder. they think Panic spirals; it’s actually my body beginning a massive allergic reaction to some of sophie’s cells, hair, or her fluid which has leaked into my blood stream (possibly when my waters were broken). Surgeon gives up on idea of forceps. James shouting at surgeon is one of my flashbacks; so is another surgeon. the one who’s seen an AFE. The only choice is to give general anaesthetic to knock me out as I’m in such a state and beginning to have respiratory problems; I’m a category 1 c section which means they have to try and get sophie out in 15 mins to save both of us. a normal c section will take twice that time to get the baby out. It’s done very quickly so my scar now looks like they did it with a knife and bloody fork!!! but hey, I’m alive.
5:40 pm: anyway, back to the thing… my legs are lowered. James has to leave.
5:56 pm: Sophie is born.
6:15 pm: Sophie is handed to James. she has a pointy red head from where she got stuck, and really wide eyes. james is in total utter love, but panicked about me. he asks if he can have skin to skin contact with sophie cos it’s what I wanted. he takes off his shirt and is wrapped in a blanket with our naked little girl snuggled into his chest hair.
7:10 pm: I’m brought out of theatre to recovery room. I have a tube down my throat, an oxygen mask and a machine is breathing for me.
James is told this is because my body can’t breathe with the drugs in my system; and what he’s not told is that I’m still having the reaction. an antidote to the GA is administered. I take about 15 mins to wake.
7:20 pm: I’m still waking. My gag reflex kicks in. i reach for my tube. The surgeon removes it. I’m dazed, scared and finding it hard to breathe. Surgeon says I should be left on my side. This doesn’t help. Surgeon leaves (remember, this is the one who thought i was panicking, not dying). I’m still unable to breathe properly. I now enter stage 2 of the AFE. around 40% of those who survive the first stage will go on to the second. I’m not sure what happens to the other 35% left over…..maybe they’re the ones who lapse into a coma now and don’t wake up? hey my coma held off a while (yeah i know. gallows humour.)

THE RECOVERY ROOM (where it really went wrong, and then right)
7:25 pm. Nurses are telling me to calm down and take deep breaths from the mask. Keep trying to tell them that i can’t breathe and the mask doesn’t help. Keep trying to take the mask off to cough. They are holding it on. James is yelling at them to look at my face. I’ve turned blue. I begin to convulse. Yellow foam pours from my mouth and nose. First consultant comes in and administers massive doses of antihystemines which should have been given about an hour before this.
Liquid is running from nose and mouth. I go into respiratory arrest. I’m resuscitated once. My heart then stops. I am resuscitated again, this time with adrenaline and a defibrillator. this is what wikipedia says about the second stage of AFE : “This is known as the hemorrhagic phase and may be accompanied by severe shivering, coughing, vomiting, and the sensation of a bad taste in the mouth. This is also accompanied by excessive bleeding as the blood loses its ability to clot. Collapse of the cardiovascular system leads to…” if the child has not been delivered by now, it’s pretty much a given it will die or be braindead at birth. thankfully my baby was safe in her daddy’s arms.

7:28 pm: Paula the midwife is yelling for assistance and various devices. People are hurrying down the halls.
James does not know where to be. He stands in a corner. People lead him away; he thinks they must be nurses.
7:30 pm: my airways have been cleared using a tube inserted into the lungs. My heart has been restarted by compressions and defibrilation. They managed it once before but right after shocking me my heart stopped again so they had to do it all again.. I’ve been given a powerful gen.anasthetic to keep me unconscious. A machine is breathing for me. I’m in a medically induced coma and on a ventilator.

8:00 pm: doctor tells James I’m alive and stable, but critical. someone phones my mum and tells her to get there asap cos theyre afraid I might not last the night.nobody has told James this as he’s in severe shock
8:30 pm: James is allowed to see me before i go to ICU. I’m in the theatre again. When James sees me it terrifies him. He touches me and tells me not to go anywhere because he needs me and loves me. The doctor and nurses need James to leave so they can prepare to move me. He’s scared to leave me. People guide him away and hand him Sophie.

10pm: my mum and dad arrive. Mum asks him how he’s coping. he breaks down and she holds him. He feels guilt for what’s happened to her baby, she’s hurt and he can do nothing about it.
10:10 pm: doctors say I’m ok to go to ICU.

I was there 24 hours. 12 in a medically induced coma, another 12 in a natural one. my body took over.

Then got sent to the high dependency unit until Wednesday 8th when i was moved to a normal ward.

James was told to go home. I get arsy and say i need him. I’ve never had to look after sophie before; or at least I can’t remember having done so and I’m really scared. The midwives and nurses don’t seem to see anything wierd in my behavior which is strange. I’m disorientated, have little or no short term memory and at one point it’s in my notes that i told a nurse the baby was a boy called Michael.(wierd cos my imaginary friend when i was a kid was Michael). I told them that if jim goes then i will discharge myself. Afraid of a bigger lawsuit then they may already be facing, they agree to give us a private room, free. It has its own bathroom. And two beds.

I got discharged on the friday… but as we made a move they said “you cant take sophie. shes not been discharged”. we got arsy again and she was eventually discharged after four hours. I was on a cocktail of drugs.

8 weeks later I was diagnosed with post natal depression and had to give up breastfeeding to go onto high dose antidepressants. In 2007 I had counselling for 6 months. it worked. Kind of. At this point I still had no idea what’d happened because guess who I saw for my 6 week check? yup. the guy who’d never heard of AFE and whos inaction towards drug administration nearly killed me.

I have been left with mild liver problems which may be directly related to the amount of drugs i had when soph was born. I know this cos my gp says because my liver enzymes havnt improved since me losing weight and getting fitter, it’s probably irrepairable. but again, I’m alive.

I didn’t feel the mummy rush of love for sophie until she was 10 weeks old. now I can’t get enough of her hairy little head and the smell at the back of her neck.

I still feel grief that I can’t have more kids, but as the risk of a second AFE is so high, and as we didnt find out it was AFE until AFTER jim had had a vasectomy, I’m content with my Sophie.

jimi was due 28th january, by the 4th of feb (exactly a week over due) they decided to give me a sweep. had that at 4pm then went walking round. had periody pains. woke up next morning (5th) at 5 am was having pains but wasnt sure if they were contractions or not. laid there till about 7 when john woke up. went for a bath. put on tens. walked up and down between bedroom and bath room all day as couldnt sit or stand still.
decided to call hospital, contractions were not regular so they said take paracetemol have a bath phone back when regular. little while later i’d had enough so phoned again and lied saying they were regular. went in. got there about 3pm.
they examined me expecting to send me home found i was 7cm. tens was annoying me and not helping at all. had a few puffs on gas and air and hated it so stopped that.
contractions still not regular but was fully dialated. stood rocking waiting for waters to break. soon as the did got up on bed to start pushing.
jimi was born at 7.18pm 5th feb weighing 8lb 15oz

this is the next day, its the earlist one i have on the computer

zac

went to mw on the 12th october, 2 days before due. had to do a mission of a journey. walk to bus. bus to town. walk to mw (about an hours walk with buggy and huge bump) see mw, back to town. round town. lunch with mate. lift back home. then had to walk up the road collecting avon books up as was doing avon at time. think that must have helped things along.
had bath, was a bit achy. went to bed.
woke up at 3am with contractions 3 minutes apart. 3.30 woke john who said call mw. found notes phoned hospital (planned home birth so have to phone hospital who then contact on duty mw and send her out) number was wrong had a digit missing. had to find number to hospital and asked to be transfered. was 4 am before i got through. mw arrived 4.30am started setting up. got examined at 5 am at just 4-5 cms. jimi woke up not long after so john grabbed his bag said he would be 30 minutes tops mw said that was fine, it would be hours yet. john left at 5.30 to take jimi to sil.
soon as he left i said he was coming i could feel the burning feeling the head makes. mw said to take my trousers off, yes this was it. minutes later with no effort from me (honestly it was like he stretched out inside me and pushed his own head out lol) his head was born. cord loosely round neck, mw slipped it over. then the rest of him was born. i caught him then tried to cut his cord but was shaking so much i only got half way through lol
few minutes later the 2nd mw arrived followed by john. i was already sitting there feeding him.
he was born 1 day before his due date, 13th october at 5.55am weighing 7lb 14oz.

here he is about 2 hours old

nate

you have heard this one but here it is anyway lol

so 3 days over due. went to see mw at 10am. while waiting went for wee had tint bit of bloody show and was a bit achy but had been having BH for 3 wweeks so wasnt sure.
mw did sweep said could feel his head pushing against her fingers, waters bulging and 3-4 cms.
went to mils was getting bad pains but didnt know if it was cos of sweep or not. john convinced me come home just in case. left boys with mil.
still worried it could be false alarm and i’d look silly so tidied toys that boys had left out. had bath, sorted my stuff out. then decided to time contractions. 3 minutes apart! ok maybe not false alarm. phoned hospital. waited for mw was now about 2 minutes apart and lasting a minute. mw phoned from that morning saying didnt think you would be long. someones on the way. took what seemed like ages. contractions closing in on a minute apart was moaning to john he’d have to deliver him himself.
mw arrived 2pm. had feel of belly did blood pressure. said pee on this stick and then i’ll see how far you are.
went to bath room, oh dear feels burning and somethings come out was panicing in case it was the cord. called john who helped me to front room. mw ran out to car (hadnt even brought hr stuff in yet)i told john to put sheets down quick he hadnt even finished when i got down to squatting on them leaning forward onto chair.
i kept saying something hanging out. mw was putting on gloves looked said its just waters. seconds later it burst then his head was out with in minutes. seemed ages till his body was born but could have only been a couple of minutes. he was born at 2.30pm on the 6th of march weight 8lb 4oz

William was due on the 13th of Feb, but I’m not known for my babies coming on time (1st induced 7 days late, 2nd 10 days late and 3rd induced 15 days late) so wasn’t really surprised that he didn’t turn up in time.

Had been getting on and off contractions since about a week before I was due, so when I woke up on the Saturday (20th) at 4am with contractions I didn’t really think much of it. They felt quite regular so I timed them and they were coming around every 5 minutes!

I got up at 5 as I was starving hungry Made myself some toast and a cup of tea, put the computer on and just generally pottered about to see if the contractions stopped or carried on. Put contraction master on and they were still coming between every 4 and 7 minutes and lasting around 40 seconds.

I was still very unsure if this was the real thing, so at half 6 I ran myself a bath and let OH know what was happening. He wasn’t impressed as he didn’t get back from work until 1:30 am I told him to go back to sleep as I wasn’t really sure yet.

Anyway, had my bath and contractions were still coming so I was finally convinced it was really happening and I would actually viagra this baby at home and not have to be induced! Yay, I was soooooo happy!

Got out the bath about 7ish. Charlie and Alice were awake by now, so got them up and did breakfast and stuff. Everything just carried on as normal really for the next couple of hours. Contractions were still only 4-7 minutes apart but definately feeling stronger. By 9:30 am the kids were stressing me out So I got OH up, Charlie was sent to OHs parents (he is a bit excitable and the last thing I needed was him in my face constantly ).

From now on times I’m not sure of as it all got a bit busy! Contractions suddenly started coming every 2-3 minutes. Phoned delivery suite to let them know. The woman on the phone asked if I needed the MW to come and check me, but I said I was fine. So she said she would get her to phone although she was pretty sure I’d need to be checked. She looked up who was on duty and told me it was Sheila. Yay, more good news! She is a lovely, no nonsense MW and also did my HB visit and was fab at helping me sort everything out, so was really pleased she’d be delivering my baby.

So while I was waiting for her to call, I phoned my mum to let her know she was needed(she was gonna watch the kids and be chief tea and coffee maker). Then I swept the floors and cleaned the kitchen as i was totally paranoid that if I stopped doing stuff my contractions would stop Got everything ready upstairs, waterproof sheets on bed, towels out and ready. Made myself a comfy cushioned bit over the bed head to lean on.

MW phoned and asked what was happening, so i filled her in and told her I’d had no show and warers still intact. She asked if I needed her, so I said no, everything was going fine so far…I think! So she asked if I was going to hospital would I go yet, so I said no. MW-’In that case, I’ll carry on with my home calls for now, but phone me as soon as you need me’ . She also asked if it was OK to send the student MW round, so I said yes..the more the merrier!

My mum turned up, couldn’t believe how calm I was…TBH I was getting fed up as things were just not moving on at all! Contractions were still 3 minutes apart, although definately getting stronger. Went for a wee and finally my plug started coming away so knew things were happening.Considered going for a walk, but thought better of it. I decided to go and chill upstairs for a bit and listen to my hypnobirthing CD one last time. So I put that on after a bit of a faff as I couldn’t get the CD player to work Made myself comfy, on my knees leaning over the headboard on the bed. This must have done something as I suddenly felt things shift and definately felt things would hapen soon. Called OH and said I neede the MW to come now. The student turned up then, and timed my contractions for me, then said oh, we need the MW now I think OH had already called though and she turned up within 5 mins.

The student MW was fantastic! She rubbed my back and helped reminding me how to breathe properly and was really calming. My poor OH felt a bit like a spare part by now Now the MW was here I could be examined. Baby was 2/5 engaged, then checked my cervix. Wowzers, already 8cm. I couldn’t believe it as I didn’t really feel in any major discomfort yet. My waters were bulging and MW said they would go any minute.

I let myself just concentrate on breathing from then on. Had my OH fetching me cold flannels as my face was feeling really flushed. It’s amazing what relief a cold flannel on the face gives. OH rubbed my back and everyone just let me get on with things really. I remember hearing the MW talking to the student, saying we would hope to be 10 cm in at least 3 hours time. All I could think was 3 hours!! I can’t do this for that long!!

Then thank goodness I heard her say ‘oh, she’s had a very bloody loss, that means it won’t be long’. Then I suddenly felt very heavy and could feel the need to push. I know from experience not too though and too breathe through as long as I can. Again the student really helped me at this stage and talked me through breathing. I think by now I would have reached for the gas and air without her help.

The next thing I really had to push…nobody had checked me so I wasn’t sure if I should But told them I needed to and MW just calmly said ‘go ahead then, your body knows what to do’ So push I did! The first push my waters went, second push the head was out, and my god did it hurt! I remember shouting at my OH ‘aaargh it really hurts’ and him replying @you should know that by now’ It only lasted seconds though and was a pain soon forgotten.

Was told to breathe slowly and stop pushing, and I really tried but my body just seemed to do it anyway and William plopped out literally MW passed him through my legs, he was very tiny and very blue, but utterly gorgeous. I couldn’t quite believe how quick it all happened. Then felt another plop and that was the placenta…how easy was that?! Second MW turned up then….better late than never I guess Slight tear, but no stitches needed, now that’s a first for me William was born at 13:18 weighing 6lb15. Labour recorded as 2 hours long.

5 minutes later I was propped up in bed with my dignity covered,my OH, my kids, my mum and my OHs parents there and a nice cup of tea…oh, and of course a brand new baby. It felt very surreal but very lovely and can’t wait to do it again

Thanks for reading and sorry it’s a mega essay xxx